I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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