Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
My butt remains clenched, sir.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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