This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Randomize
