my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
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