Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
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