Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
Randomize
