It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
a search helicopter?!
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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