so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
Answer the phone when I call you in a second. Just got pulled over for getting road head, going to secretly put you on speaker phone, this should be good
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
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