i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
Randomize
