this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Randomize
