Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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