My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
I think I sprained my soul last night
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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