I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
Randomize
