You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
Instead of politely asking me to shave, he passive-aggressively left me a groupon for a bikini wax. So I passive-aggresively fucked his roommate. And his roommate didn't mind my bush when he went down on me. Anyway, do you want the groupon or not?
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
Randomize
