google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
Shame - the story of my life.
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