hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
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