is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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