I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
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