what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
Randomize
