If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
Randomize
