I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
Randomize
