I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
Randomize
