He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize
