Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
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