Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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