I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
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