remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
