Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
