I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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