just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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