you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
Randomize