walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
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