Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(301): View more from Maryland

i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.

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(831): View more from California

I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.

(1-831): View more from California

stop. you already have a dog

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on

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(815): View more from Illinois

you thought your balls were fighting each other...

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(920): View more from Wisconsin

Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea

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(504): View more from Louisiana

Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.

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(206): View more from Washington

What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.

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(305): View more from Florida

That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.

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(585): View more from New York

dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.

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