also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
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