HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
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