okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
Randomize
