put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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