what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
Randomize
