i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
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