I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
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Do I have a choice?
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I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
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