didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
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