It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
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