Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
Randomize
