So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Randomize
