Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
Randomize
