are you so shy because you have an std?
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
