seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
