If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
It's just like the Real World with babies
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
Randomize
