Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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