So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Randomize
